I have Crohn’s Disease and I have found myself in true remission for the first time in a very long time. I’m not taking anything heavy-duty as far as medicine goes, I think I have finally found myself not stressing as much. One change is the lack of frenemies in my life. I can’t believe how important it is to clear out your life, to simplify, to get back to basics. It’s taken me a while, but I’ve learned to let go of what and/or who is NOT important. My health is more important to me and my family than those people who make me have to prove myself ‘worthy’ enough of their friendship. Those people are not true friends, nor will they ever be.
With Crohn’s, every day is truly a surprise. I am just thankful to have a string of good days. I still get low energy. I still get aches and pains. I also still have days with no appetite. However, there hasn’t been any surgeries for a couple of years (knock on wood). I’m not in the bathroom all day long. And I haven’t had to use my heating pad in quite a while. The heating pad is a very important tool for the average Crohnie. Some days, the belly hurts so bad, all you can do is lie in bed with the heating pad warming up your guts.
So, with this remission, I’ve given myself a few goals. I would like to go on a statewide ‘Visitation’ Tour. There are several friends and family members who live out of town that I just don’t get to see as much as I would like because I’m always scared to leave my house. I like to travel, I just don’t get to much. I think that seeing some of my favorite folks can only better my life at this point! A part-time job is also on my list. Not only could we really use the extra income, but that’s one more step toward normalcy. I’m also working on playing catch up. Some things I’ve let go because I felt as though I was overwhelmed with just living. I will make the phone calls, run the errands, and anything else that has been placed on the back burner bc I just didn’t feel like it. I guess I’m finally learning after 15+ years of this disease to celebrate the good times and to quit moping that I have a chronic disease. Fixation, I’ve come to believe, leads to inevitable depression, which can throw the body right back into a flare.
So, it’s time to celebrate HEALTH! I hope that means that I’ll be a better wife, a better mother, and a better friend. I just want to be a better PERSON. At least, these are my goals. I have enjoyed walking through fallen, crispy, pungent leaves this Fall. I appreciate the bright, Autumn sunshine that blinds me as I take my boys to school. I also appreciate the cooler weather, warm pajamas, and hot drinks. I’m just appreciative that I still have my LIFE. Yes, it’s a life interrupted, but it’s LIFE and I’m glad I’m able to enjoy it for a while!